The Fifth: Hate for TV

Thank the Lord for our dear government saving us from analog signals and getting my ass to give up TV. There are few material objects I hold more hate for than television.... If any... maybe gigantic killing machines are worse on the scale but they sure as hell aren't as much of a nuisance. The television I have is like another member of the house hold or something. Its always fucking talking to my mother. It never says anything intelligent and doesn't have an inside voice.
When the television in on my mind can't focus on anything else for more than a few moments. Even though I despise every second that bastard is on my ears still strain to hear it through the walls and put the pieces of dialogue together. When I'm in the kitchen my legs carry me around the corner to peer at the screen regardless of what I'm doing or whats on. It sickens me that I was raised by our shining black box. All my knowledge of our culture and social mores came from that awful box. Every bit of story-telling talent I have in me came from the one eyed monster. When I was in middle school I added it up and realised I spent as much time watching television per week as I did sitting in a classroom. So much of my time was wasted that way, and I didn't even have cable!
I only watch a few hours of television a day now, if that. Maybe less than 10 hours a week - which is more than I'd like. Come February it will be no more. I don't have cable, and I wont be getting one of those fucking converters. The TV will be soled. While it's a blessing for me, my mother might go through withdrawals. I really love her but couldn't care less about that. It's been hell trying to block out the fucking noise while studying.
I thought this would be a rant to make me angry but now that the TV is off and I have a moment of peace I am so overjoyed. February 17, 2009... Only 80 days until freedom... Hallelujah

[Oh and another thing, the bill thats causing all this, the Deficit Reduction Act of 2005 was intended to streamline governenment programs like medicare and medicade making them more efficient and less costly. Sure. Ok. Somewhere along the line an asshole added in the maditory switch to digital television at the price of 990 million tax dollars (to pay for those $40 converter coupons each american is supposd to get). Woo, irony.]